Are you feeling very down now? The best medicine for you is these hilarious jokes. These are not ordinary jokes which you hear every day. You will discover a new kind of humor – hilarious joke that will make you cry. After reading them it will be simply impossible to feel depressed or sad. This is a real mood booster. Do not keep jokes only for you. Remember that your friends may feel stressed after a hard working day or problems in their personal life. So, you should spread these jokes online.
What do you get when you cross-breed a shark and a cow?
I have no idea but I wouldn’t try milking it.
Oh, man! A hyperbole totally ripped into this bar and destroyed everything!
A hyperbole is an exaggerated claim. No, really, realllllllllllyyyyy exaggerated. I mean, like, the most exaggerated thing in the history of ever!!”
Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me.
It means a lot.
A man is walking in a graveyard when he hears the Third Symphony played backward. When it’s over, the Second Symphony starts playing, also backward, and then the First. “What’s going on?” he asks a cemetery worker.
“It’s Beethoven,” says the worker. “He’s decomposing.”
Funny hilarious jokes
What does make a joke to be creative and memorable? Of course, we speak about jokes which are fresh and never heard before. Below, you will find a lot of fresh and funny hilarious jokes, which you should tell your good friends. They will be very surprised to hear something new and funny.
Of course I should clean my windows. But privacy is important too.
On New Year’s Eve, I’ll join my friends to toast the days ahead. We’ll all stay up until it’s late, then eat a tasty spread. At midnight, though, I might just wish that I were home instead, sleeping very peacefully in my warm, cozy bed.
What do you call an imaginary color?
A pigment of your imagination.
This sentence contains exactly threeee erors.
The third error? The fact that there are only two errors. The fourth error? Running this gag.
Sometimes it is very important if a sentence was said by a man or a woman. A good example: “I used a whole pack of tissues during that awesome movie yesterday!”
“Q: How do mathematicians scold their children?
A: “If I’ve told you n times, I’ve told you n+1 times …”
Hilarious jokes for teens
All young people are full of energy. They are full of life and love to spend their time with friends doing funny things. These hilarious jokes for teens will entertain all young people and make their day much better.
N is a placeholder for a number. Adding one makes it one more than whatever n is. We could have used X, but this is a family magazine.”
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?
The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.
There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “Okay, now what?”
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!”
Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
The only time nothing is negative is under the Christmas tree. So when counting down, happily stop at nothing—or zero—to avoid the dreaded negative numbers.
A man showed up for a duel armed only with a pencil and paper.
He then proceeded to draw his weapon.
Hilarious jokes short
Even a short joke can be super funny. The following hilarious jokes short will help you to make all your friends laugh like crazy beasts.
I just got a photo from a speeding camera through the mail. I sent it right back – way too expensive and really bad quality.
Did you hear that Santa knows karate?
He has a black belt.
Where do cows go for entertainment?
To the moo-vies!
A guy spots a sign outside a house that reads “Talking Dog for Sale.” Intrigued, he walks in.
“So what have you done with your life?” he asks the dog.
I’ve led a very full life,” says the dog. “I lived in the Alps rescuing avalanche victims. Then I served my country in Iraq. And now I spend my days reading to the residents of a retirement home.
The guy is flabbergasted. He asks the dog’s owner, “Why on earth would you want to get rid of an incredible dog like that?”
The owner says, “Because he’s a liar! He never did any of that!”
Husband brings the child home from kindergarten and asks his wife, “”He’s been crying the whole way home. Isn’t he sick or something?”
“No,” replies the wife, “he was just trying to tell you he isn’t our Frankie.”
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was, “Bach, Bach, Bach …”
And his cows preferred Moo-zak.
How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?
Your head hits the ceiling!
At a disco:
He: “Wow, what’s a cute girl like you doing in a corner all alone?”
She: “I had to fart.”
Several years ago we headed to a nearby town to visit some relatives. I had a new car and was having fun driving fast on the twisty country roads.
As we zoomed along, I noticed a three-legged chicken keeping pace with me. I slowed to get a…
A ventriloquist is performing with his dummy on his lap. He’s telling a dumb-blonde joke when a young platinum-haired beauty jumps to her feet. “What gives you the right to stereotype blondes that way?” she demands. “What does hair color have to do with my worth as a human being?” Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to stammer out an apology. “You keep out of this!” she yells. “I’m talking to that little jerk on your knee!”
Why did the elephant paint himself different colors?
So he could hide in the crayon box!
A photon is going through airport security. The TSA agent asks if he has any luggage. The photon says, “No, I’m traveling light.
Photons are particles representing an amount of light. This particular photon didn’t need a suitcase because it was going to a nudist convention.”
Broccoli: Hey, I look like a tree.
Mushroom: Wow, I look just like an umbrella.
Walnut: I look exactly like a brain.
Banana: Man, can we change the topic please?
A sign at a music shop: “Gone Chopin. Bach in a minuet.
The Lizst of funny music puns is not long. In fact, anyone caught telling one often ends up in Haydn.
Hilarious jokes on images